It's been quite the week. I'm trying to come up with something witty to start this post with, but nothing is coming to me. I guess I'll just get into it.

On Tuesday I had a really good friend over to watch a movie. As we were going through the movie choices, she mentioned something about boys and instantly our focus switched. We didn't end up watching a movie. Instead we talked for five hours. Mostly about boys. She's going to try and set me up with a few people, including a guy from her mission that lives in Provo. (He thinks I'm cute.) She also has a few other friends that have seen my pictures via her facebook that want her to hook them up with me. I'm game. It was very much fun, and I just needed that girl's night.

The next night was institute. We had about eight quilts to tie, and I helped with one. About the time I needed a break, Pete showed up and I went over to try and teach him how to tie a quilt. He was hopeless and I ended up just finishing off his strand of yarn and talking to him for the rest of the night. He gave me a ride home and I got online. (Because that's what I do.)

Thursday was the day of my date with Pete. I woke up very excited, and couldn't wait for it to start. Somewhere during the time when I was getting ready, I got a phone call from my sister. She had seen on the news that one of my all time favorite teachers had been arrested for sexual misconduct with a student. I don't believe it's true. I've thought about it a lot, and I honestly don't believe it's true. I went onto the news web page and sure enough, there he was along with a brief story. They had a picture of his mugshot, and I kept thinking "This isn't the man I know. He's not smiling, his eyes are dull. This is not him." I credit this man to a large amount of my growth as a person. In an incredibly difficult time in my life when the world around me was threatening to bring me down, he was one who could make me feel like I was a wonderful person. That my life was worth something and that I had so much to give. This news absolutely devastated me.

I began to read some of the comments on this story, growing more and more depressed with each harsh and negative word. I needed to make one of my own. I put a lot of thought into it, and this is what I wrote:

"This man is one of my favorite people. I don't know whether the accusations against him are true or not, but I do know one thing; he does not deserve the hatred and insults he has been receiving in these comments. Do not judge a man that you do not know because of a story that we do not know the end of. That is all I have to say in the matter."

Needless to say, my desire to go on the date was pretty much non-existent after that. But I finished getting ready and went, burying the experience deep. I wanted to enjoy this date, despite the knowledge I now had.

Pete and I went to McDonald's and then to see Avatar. (Great movie!) We sat a little too close to the screen, and my head started to hurt halfway through the three hour movie. I very much enjoyed it, though.

There were a couple times I thought about reaching over and holding Pete's hand...but I realized that I really didn't want to. When the movie was over, my head hurt, and I just wanted to go home. I didn't have patience for that awkward "What now?" scene in the truck outside of my house, so I said:

"Can I have a hug?"

I reached across the seat, hugged him and got out of the car. It might be that I was just upset but I don't think I'm feeling anything special for Pete. I must have been really distracted or unimpressed enough that I didn't even think about the fact that his awesome arms were around me.

I didn't get a hair cut today. I knew I wouldn't have a car (my parents went out of town). I didn't plan that when I had made the appointment. I'll have to make a new one. I'll post before and after pictures.

It was a very busy week, and I'm glad it's coming to a close.

WARNING: Incredibly long post.

It's kind of surprising me how one conscious decision and some listening to the spirit has done for me in just two short days. A week ago, I would have sat at home with none of these experiences coming my way, and guaranteed a lot of sadness following it.

On Sunday, I was INCREDIBLY depressed. I cried quarts. With the help of a couple of friends, I changed the direction of my life. It was hard in the moment, but now I can feel how much that turn around has changed things. This change will make it so much easier to turn my back on those short comings.

Just after I did this, I emailed a bunch of friends. People that I wanted to hang out with and set up 'play dates.' I couldn't wait to get to church because it meant I would get out of my house. I couldn't wait to see people. I've realized that I spend WAY too much time online, and though talking to my online friends is great; I need some In Real Life (IRL) social contact.

Church was my first stop. You can read about the beginning of these exploits here.

It was 'Linger Longer*' after church and I was very excited. There are two different Singles Wards in my home town, and we combine for this activity once every month, rotating whose turn it is to prepare the activity. My ward's Linger Longers are INSANELY cool! Amazing food, decorations, different and fabulous things to drink. It's awesome. This week we were able to make our own grilled cheese sandwiches. (Tip: honey butter on a grilled cheese sandwich = fabulous!)

During this, I had the chance to flirt with two guys that I think are pretty cool. Pete and Devin. I had spent the last three hours of church with Pete since the Black Licorice Gum incident. I noticed that Devin was sitting alone, and because I kind of like him, too; I called over (totally out of character, I might add.) and invited him to sit with us. Another girl sat with us. Her name is Natalie, and she's about amazing. I quite love her to death. The fact that she's a fellow Friends addict instantly raised my appreciation for her. It was a great time. Flirting and laughter are bomb.

Yesterday, I went to lunch with a close friend of mine. She has been in town for nearly two months and I haven't spent any time with her, and I felt the need to remedy that. We went out to lunch and jammed on guitar. It was great to catch up with her, and I'm so glad we were able to make that happen.

My aunt and uncle are in town and the entire family went to my grandmother's house for soup and good company. I almost didn't go. I'm so VERY glad that I did. I was able to chat with two of my younger cousins. I love those girls! They are just cute, and so much fun to talk to. I'm very happy that I went and was able to spend time with family.

I did leave early. I had promised Natalie that I would come to the ward's Family Home Evening. You can read a bit about that event here. We played I've never, which is an incredibly fun game. The best is when you get targeted. There's no one to trade chairs with, as you are the only one who has done that thing. Someone tried to target me with "I've never made videos for YouTube." Half of the circle stood up, which surprised me.

After the game, we converged into the kitchen to munch on leftovers from Linger Longer the day before. Good chatting ensued. Including Pete asking me if I wanted to go on a date.

Pete: Have you seen the movie Avatar?

Kate: No, I haven't. I want to though.

Pete: I haven't seen it either. I want to.

...

Pete: We should go.

Kate: Yeah, I'd like that.

...

Kate: *after a long pause* When?

Pete: Oh! Umm...Thursday?

Kate: Sounds great!

I have so much more happening this week. I'll blog about it all, I'm sure. Movie night with a girl-friend tonight. Institute tomorrow. Date on Thursday. Haircut on Friday. It's going to be a good week. I'm determined to make it so.

So, I realized yesterday that I haven't been on an official date since early October, 2008. I went to the corn maze. Lame-sauce! Sure. There have a few other happenings that could count as dates. But there wasn't anything planned, or I paid for myself. I could count these on one hand (four fingers to be exact), but I don't really count these occurrences as dates.

I've decided to work on this. I'm not sure exactly what I can do...except be more social. So that's what I've decided to do.

Yesterday I was late for Sacrament Meeting. Not overly late, I arrived during the opening hymn. Usually in this occurrence I would sit on the back row, so I don't disturb anyone. Apparently, quite a few people were late to Sacrament meeting and the back rows were full. So I started to work my way up the aisle, aiming for the next empty pew. There, a pew behind it, was Pete. Pete is one of the guys I not-really-dated*. He's cute and funny. I would say yes if he asked me out.

So as I'm walking past, I see him, and in the two seconds where I debated moving forward or sitting with him, these thoughts zoomed through my head. "Just keep walking. But if you sit with him, maybe he'll ask you out. Be social, wasn't that the goal? But what if he doesn't WANT to sit by me? Well, you better make a decision because you are by his pew, and if you want to sit with him, you better decide quick!"

"Hey Pete." I whisper. "Can I sit by you?"

He moved aside making room for me, I have no idea if he was smiling or not. I set my stuff of the empty pew in front of me and leaned back against the pew. I smiled shyly and looked forward. It was actually a bit awkward and I kind of regretted sitting by him. What if he didn't want me to sit by him? But on the spot like that, what is he going to do? We're in the middle of singing 'Lord, I Would Follow Thee' and he exclaims, "NO! You can not sit by me Katie Weber!" Psh. Right.

We sat there in silence through the ward/stake business and I longed to lean over and whisper something, breaking the tension. But what if he was totally enjoying the sustaining of the new Stake Young Women's presidency? Who was I to interrupt him unless I had some really insightful thing to say. We moved on to the rest hymn and the sacrament. Whew! An excuse to not speak. We're being reverent. But it was over quickly and the first speaker stood up.

Pete then reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of gum, offering me a piece. I took it, an entire scene from Friends** running through my head. I unwrap the gum. 'Blackjack' it says. The gum inside is black too. In my head I wonder if this is that turn-your-teeth-black prank gum, but he puts his stick in his mouth and I lift mine to do the same, figuring it must be safe. I lean over as I do this. "What kind of gum is this?" The gum touches my tongue, answering for myself as he replies. "Black Licorice."

Anyone that knows me knows I HATE black licorice. But what was I to do? Give it back? No! It had been on my tongue! I put the stick in my mouth and began to chew, wincing at the grotesque flavor. I made a few clearing-my-throat noises as I tried not to show my utter revulsion as the flavor filled my mouth. He looked over at me with a smirk.

"Do you not like it?"

"I hate black licorice." I'm sure my face looked disgusted.

He chuckled. This painful experience gave us something to whisper about during the talks that we should have been listening to. I chewed that piece of gum all through Sacrament Meeting. Success!

Still no date, but things are looking up.

*A friend of mine invited me to play games with a bunch of people. It ended up just being Pete and I, and she and her fiance. It was very paired off...and if Pete had asked me...I'd call it a date. But he didn't, so it wasn't.

**The one where Chandler gets stuck in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre (Victoria's Secret Model). She offers him gum. He says no because it wasn't sugarless. He then screams at himself in his head because if Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. He then changes his mind, saying "On second thought, gum would be perfection." I almost said this. I knew that this was my chance to break the tension on the pew. I would not turn down the gum like Chandler had.

Earlier this evening I had the chance to talk to a friend. She needed advice about a hard time she's been having in her life. As I was telling her a few cliche tips, trying to make her feel better, a thought hit me.

This was the thought:

"This is just one squelchy and icky step on your journey to happiness. You'll get out of this swamp. When you do; clean off your shoes, but don't forget it. There may be other swamps in the future and the knowledge you gained from this one will help you through it. And remember you always have a walking stick, a hand to help pull you out of those sticky situations. Pray always!"

It helped her out, which I was glad for.

I came to the realization today that I have about 450 facebook friends. And I realized that while I have this great tool with which to communicate with them, I rarely use it.

Today I went through my massive lists of friends with the intent of messaging those people that I care about. There were a lot more than I really expected.

I went through, skimming the surface of names and left them quick and honest messages.

I finished the night with a total of 72 people messaged.

The plan is to go back through tomorrow and say "Hi!" to a few more!