I'm feeling down.

Down like a bird that can't fly.

Down like a fallen dish, shattered on the floor.

Down like... something that's not up. (I'm out of metaphors.)

There are a few reasons why this is...

1. I think it's finally sinking in that my Grandma is gone and that she's really not going to be there the next time I go to her house. Anytime I think about Thanksgiving, or Christmas Eve, it really hurts. She was the center of both of those holidays and traditions, and change scares me. I miss my grandma.

2. I'm unemployed again. When I started my job, I knew that it might only be temporary. I was taking the place of a 70 year old woman who had broken her arm and had a myriad of other health problems. But they wanted her back when she was better if her doctor gave her the okay. She wasn't supposed to be back until November. When I showed up for work on Wednesday, she was there. Two weeks early. She and my coworker were shocked that no one had called me. I went down to my bosses office trying not to cry. 

3. I had to take down my green screen out of the spare bedroom. And I have no idea where I can put it now when I make my next book review. But that's kind of minor. I'm just a little bummed.

4. National Novel Writing Month starts in 9 days. While I think I've got a pretty good idea of what I'm doing, I'm a little bit terrified.

5. I just want someone to hold me.

Enough of me whining. Here are some happy things too.

1. It's raining and smells wonderful. The sun is shining through the clouds and the wet, colorful leaves look beautiful.

2. I'm about to play (and maybe finish) Zelda: Ocarina of Time. That's awesome!

3. I've started making my Halloween costume! It's poofy!

Things aren't so bad. I've got a good life and things to keep me busy.